28th Birthday!!!

And I'm officially 28 today!!!

I'm 28 and to be honest I do not know what I'm doing with my life. Not that I have not achieved anything. I'm married, have a wonderful child (and yes, with god's permission, would have another one by July 2010), the marketing manager of a food company, both my parents are still alive, have great siblings, drives a nice car, bought my own apartment, and so far am blessed with a good health.

Yet, I'm not sure what I'm doing with my life. What do I have to look for in 20 years time? Or in 2 years time?

As I'm working for my family, what do I do if I lose any one of them?

I see the company as a whole prospering, but where do I stand when they are big?

Will my siblings rely on me or do I have to look at them being more successful than I am?

I have my own apartment, but would I be able to provide my family with a bigger house if, as a family, we grow bigger?

Will my children be able to depend on me for years to come or would they think that my wife is the more suitable parent?

Though I do exercise quite often, is it enough for my health as I have already been diagnosed with HCM (hypertrophic cardiomyopathy)?

These questions have been playing around in my head for a few days now and up until now, I am unable to find inner peace with myself. I know that these questions could not be answered immediately, but for some reason, I hope that they can.

And due to these questions, I am not enjoying my Birthday so much compared to previous years. Although my family has just made a suprise party for me, which, of course I am very happy, but, as a whole, I am very restless inside.

Allah, please provide me with the light and road for me to take. Amin.